Girlfriends
Girls come in different shapes, sizes, and beauties. Picking a girl to be with is like being in a candy store, however, there are consequences. If you eat candy, you pack on pounds; when you find a girl, you must deal with her as a GIRLFRIEND. This may seem confusing but when a girl becomes a girlfriend, her persona changes completely. Girls are not themselves until the relationship becomes “official”. Almost all girlfriends fall into one of the following four categories: the “clingy” type, the “lovey dovey” type, the “Is she a man or girl?” type, and lastly, the “mother” type. There is hope though, there are rare cases that a girlfriend can remain tolerable, amazing, and what we like to label as, perfect.
The “clingy” type is well, desperate. Must I say more? She has a new boyfriend every few weeks, and a new style to match her boyfriend. This girl will change from punker, to ghetto, or to preppy to match her boyfriends. Not only does their attitude change from over emotional, to hardcore, or to “Miss Optimistic”, but so does her style. One week she will have multi-colored hair, the next she will have corn rows, then onto a slicked back pony tail. Sadly, these girlfriends’ excuse for such behavior is that they believe no one loves them and they must fill their eternal black hole with boys who will love her. It is great at first that she is desperate for such simpletons as boys, but being with her becomes tedious when she calls for the fifth time at a friend's birthday party to make sure you still like her. After ensuring her your feelings are genuine, she calls back in 10 minutes after she finds a girl has commented your Myspace page. This girlfriend seems scary, but there is a more dangerous type.
The dangerous “lovey dovey” type is the one to watch out for. She is the potentially crazy psycho ex if she is kicked to the curb. She turns out to be a stalker, shows up to family dinner after a week of dating, and buys a two week...