December 8, 2008
The GRIT strategy is shown to be a greatly effective means of resolving conflict between two parties. GRIT stands for Graduated Reciprocated Initiatives in Tension Reduction. This is a three step process which basically entails publicly announcing a conciliatory intent to apply public pressure and assure a public commitment, committing several verifiable conciliatory acts, thus intensifying pressure to reciprocate, and then maintaining retaliatory capability in case the other side fails to follow through. Very often in divorce cases, a husband and wife may disagree on the custody of their children or distribution of finances/belongings. I will now present a possible solution to some of these problems using the GRIT strategy.
Step one of the process is that one side announces a conciliatory intent to apply public pressure and assure a public commitment. Let’s say that a couple in the middle of a divorce are arguing over when the husband will get to see his children. According to the GRIT strategy, the wife would say something like “Let’s see if we can make an arrangement that suits both of our needs.” This is an example of publicly announcing conciliatory intent, putting pressure on the husband to agree to compromise.
The next step is to commit several verifiable conciliatory acts, thus intensifying the pressure to reciprocate. An example would be:
Mother: I will let you have them on Christmas Day, if they can stay with me on Christmas Eve.
Father: Fine, then you can have them on Thanksgiving, if I can have them on Easter.
This is an example of one conciliatory act, which is reducing the tension between the two of them, but increasing pressure on the other person to reciprocate. The more conciliatory acts that occur, the greater pressure there is put on the other person.
The last and final step is to maintain retaliatory capability in case the other side fails to follow through. An example of...