Living with Bipolar Disorder
Shavaka N Freeman
For weeks I had been suffering greatly from depression. I had just got out of a three year relationship that ended badly. I and my mother were going at it constantly. I started hallucinating. I was hearing voices. When ever I tried to take my mind off everything a write my short stories my writings started to become schizophrenic. I started spending all my money on unnecessary items. I could see TV in 3-D, I thought I could walk on water, I thought I could time travel, and I thought I would be able to fly. These are some of the things at the top of my head that I remember doing. I don’t remember much. This might sound unrealistic but I assure you I believed these things 100%. I was convinced I was a super being, a super hero. I spent days upon days trying to time travel. It felt like being in a movie. It was like being high on life. I was manic. I know it’s hard to believe, but all of these things became my passions. I felt destined to acquire these abilities and my explanation for everything was that I was stuck in a dream. And for the next 30 days I lived like it.
To be mentally insane temporarily and then going back to normal is called the slip back into reality. This occurred when my psychologist and psychiatrist convinced me that I was not in a dream. I didn’t believe them for a while until one day it hit me. I then became depressed again for a week or so, but then back to hypomania. This is when I was diagnosed bipolar. Within a year I had been diagnosed with anxiety disorders like panic disorder and OCD and then I was diagnosed ADHD. I am currently on 6 different prescribed medications yet I still have minor panic attacks every day.
To relate to someone with bipolar disorder, you have to have done some type of mind altering drug. Imagine that bipolar disorder is like having an unwanted drug in your system. It...