Formal Essay II (Rogerian)
What About the Children?
Marriage is between two people who have decided to make a lifetime commitment to their partner. During their marriage, some people choose to have children. What happens to those children if the marriage does not work out? Divorce can and does impact children. Will it impact them in a negative manner? Is it a better option to stay in the relationship for the sake of the children? There are many pros and cons to both scenarios.
First, we need to look at some of the research involving the effect of divorce on children. Children whose parents chose to divorce while they were young have a harder time establishing a close relationship with their parents later in life. R. Chris Fraley, associate professor at the University of Illinois, said, “A person who has a secure relationship with a parent is more likely than someone who is insecure to feel that they can trust the parent. Such a person is more comfortable depending on the parent and is confident that parent will be psychologically available when needed.” Children tend to think their parents can solve any problem and have a hard time understanding why they cannot work through their issues and remain together. Desai says more than thirty years of research continues to show us the effects that divorce has on children. Children from divorced homes suffer academically, have a higher level of behavioral issues, and are more likely to be incarcerated for committing a crime as a juvenile. Children are also five times more likely to live in poverty due to the custodial parent’s income dropping substantially. Psychologist Judith Wallerstein followed a group of children of divorce from the 1970’s into the 1990’s. She concluded that even after twenty-five years, “children continued to experience expectations of failure, fear of loss, fear of change, and fear of conflict.” Children of divorce tend to have premarital sex or live with someone before...