What does it mean to succeed?
To get all you want and never need?
My heart is consumed by a malicious greed.
If joy was blood then I'd have a need to bleed,
Constantly.
There's a tower of gloom floating over me.
It stretches farther than I can see.
Why won't it just let me be?
I'm not hurting anyone, can't you see?
Can't you see?
God is missing in my world of dismal fate.
My mind is a bucket of sewage and hate.
If I could go back in time, I'd change it all, but it's too late.
I just want out, out of this world I created.
Let me go back to the time I was elated.
I may have come so far from where I waited,
But now my temple is broken, desecrated.
My brain is scrambling and pouring out my ears.
I have pockets filled with regrets and a wallet full of fears,
But if I go, what will happen to those I hold dear?
Swallowed by my sorrows where none can see or hear?
I'm nothing but a ghost of my former self,
A remnant of the past.
But if I'm so new and unused, why do I feel so broken?
Is this the fruit of my labour?
My greatest demise coming so fast.
At last,
is it almost over?
You know you're fucked in the head,
If nothing touches your heart but dread.
You find no joy in anything that you do,
And you think your shadow looks better than you.
So slender and perfect.
A being without a single defect.
A cluster of darkness out of light.
A dweller of the black pitch of night.
Caught in my throat, this life thing is hard to swallow.
It's tough fighting demons you can't smite or hallow.
In the end, I'm young at heart but I'm still just a shadow,
Of my former self.
Goes to show,
I'm just a crow.
No wings to fly.
No hope to try.