Ms. ik
Director of Non-Awesomeness
Annoying Corporations
IDK your address
San Antonio, TX 78250
Dear Ms. i
Over the past few weeks, I've learned to look past Ms. i sadistic zingers. I've learned to look past some of the salacious things i has said. I've even learned to look past her attempts to force me to swallow her beliefs (as I would certainly not call them logically reasoned arguments) whole, without question or quibble. But I cannot stay silent about iincomprehensible and unforgivable audacity regarding a specific event that recently occurred. As you read this letter, bear in mind that there are many points of general dissatisfaction and dispute that should not, on any account, be overlooked in the discussion of the subjects here presented. One of these is that I recently received some mail in which the writer stated, "Mari's associates are more determined than most obstreperous, ostentatious head cases." I included that quote not because it is exceptional in any way but rather because it is typical of much of the mail I receive. I included it to show you that I'm not the only one who thinks that ii would love to see me give in to the quacks, witch doctors, charmers, sorcerers and fortune tellers who tell us that a knowledge of correct diction, even if unused, evinces a superiority that covers cowardice or stupidity. There are several logical contradictions in i position on this matter. For example, there's a chance that she will impinge upon our daily lives in the immediate years ahead. Well, that's extremely speculative, but it is clear today that Mari claims that violence and prejudice are funny. Well, I beg to differ. Until we address this issue, we will never move beyond it.
I hope this didn’t hurt your feelings,
PS: If you have any feelings.
i
Director, Awesomeness Inc.