Tiphanie Brockman
Period 1
Satire Essay
January 20, 2010
There are truly many troubling issues in the world that effect millions of people. But I, like the millions of people living in America only care about ourselves and the people in our country. Lately the state of our economy seems to be getting worse and worse and now we are in a recession! Oh my gosh what is next, another great depression! So I have come up with some ideas that I think are practical and probable solutions to this problem.
First off, let’s talk about money. Money makes the world go round right? WRONG! Well, it’s wrong if you don’t have any money at least. So most Americans need money and they need it fast. But, in contrast Americans also have a tendency to be very lazy. So I asked myself what ways can Americans gain more money without having to overwork themselves? Well, solution number one is to stop having KIDS! Hello birth control was invented for a reason….so you can save some MONEY! I mean I wonder if parents even think about how much money they spend on their kids. We’re talking about saving thousands of dollars a year! Less people to buy food and clothes for not to mention no extracurriculars and no COLLEGE TUITION! Jeez I mean you’d literally be rolling in the dough!
So now I know not everyone will be on board with the whole no kids idea. So I decided to do some research for you pro-child people. Last year I found out Americans spent 110 billion dollars in fast food. Really people that much money? Do you really need it, no, but you buy it anyways. For you people who eat fast food everyday imagine how much money you’d save if you stop buying it permanently! Yes it would put McDonald’s, Burger King etc. out of business, but they are all just greedy money hungry people. Then if we put the fast food industry out of business it would simultaneously solve our health care problem! Yeah bet you didn’t even think about that! You have problems getting health...