I stood beside the road, watching her as she drove away, very slowly and very wretchedly the form of her light green tinted expedition grew smaller as it traveled into the distance. I remember how the clouds overhead grew darker and darker, and thinking to myself, how much worse can this day get. Not even a smidgen of sunshine shown through the muted sky; it was as if it was mocking me, mirroring how unhappy I was. It was so hard for me to stand there; I just wanted to chase her down, and grab onto the back of her car, as if I could just pull her back into our childhood memories; right back into all those years of growing up together. But I had to stick to reality, and I knew under no circumstance was she going to stay.
The next day was dreadful, and I knew things would only get worse. It was my first day of intermediate, and I didn’t even have my best friend by my side to walk me through the crowded hallways. I remember thinking how I never thought I could be so lonely; in fact, I never thought my best friend leaving would be the reason for me to feel that way. Jordyn was the only person that I ever talked deeply with, and now I didn’t have anyone there for me to express myself to. I was torn up inside, and it was hard keeping all these deep thoughts to myself. I just wanted someone to be there for me the way she was before she moved.
From what I remember, loneliness is one of the hardest things that I had to deal with as a kid. It was tough not having anyone there to laugh and joke with, and make more memories to add to all of the old ones. I knew that this wasn’t just a healing process, and that it wasn’t going to just go away, I was going to have to find something or someone to fill the emptiness inside of me. I remembered thinking how it wasn’t going to be easy, but it had to be done if I wanted to be a happy again.
It was embarrassing to walk down the halls knowing that all the kids at school referred to me as a loner, and even worse, a loser. All...