I believe that having this competitive nature helps me to be a more assertive person. Without it I would be shy and timid. It is hard for me to sit back quietly without voicing my opinion, especially if I feel that I am right.
I agree with this definition for the most part, but also believe that there are times that a person has to be abrasive in stating what they want or how they feel.
Confrontation and problem solving, I know that it is best to wait until your (my) anger cools down. I don’t believe that works for everyone (me). I need to get my point across at that time. I don’t believe it would be effective after the fact.
I also don’t like the whole “Appeal to a third Party” situation approach. They might not agree with me and my opinion in the confrontation. I don’t need or want the help in getting my point across;I believe that I am assertive enough to do that myself. I also surely don’t want to be out numbered. The confrontation is no one else’s business anyways most of the time. In a work place or professional setting I believe differently. In those cases someone (i.e. Boss or Supervisor) that is not involved in the confrontation should step in to resolve the situation.
Filing a grievance against another person is as I believe to be the adult way of tattling on another person. Nothing gets resolved because of a grievance. I have seen many people during my time in the navy file grievances on someone one day, and then the next it just gets worse for them. Most of the time if the person would just confront the other person and say “hey I didn’t like what you said can you please not say that again”, or give that person a little taste of there own medicine and see how they like it. I can almost bet that whatever they did would stop.
Disarming the opposition sounds to me that this happens a lot in a marriage more than in the work place. It really does work, if you can control your anger. This is a great way to avoid even starting a confrontation...