I have had a hard time sleeping these last few nights.
I keep waking up in the middle of the night,
tears in my eyes. Trying to believe the new reality.
But despite all the pain, the grief, the infinite night…..
Amazingly, unexplainably, the sun keeps coming up.
These past few nights, when I bolt up in bed.
Im surrounded by images of our childhood.
Birthdays he always sang las mananitas to all of us.
His songs and poems. He would sit for hours singing and playing the guitar. His boxing lessons: Adan and I would wait for my dad to come home from work with our boxing gloves on ready to spar.
He laughed till he cried. His love for my mother (neverending)
The way he would play fight with my brothers, caress my sisters, kiss my mother.
So in the future if any of his grandchildren ask “what was grandpa like”? I know what im going to say. Ill say look at all of these people around you, all these family and friends, all the people who knew dad, and the incredible bond between them. were like a giant jigsaw puzzle, which fits together so tightly, that when you remove one piece, you can still see its outline in the empty space. All of the love dad left behind, the relationships he nurtured, they define his shape. You can still see him and feel him. As my father layed in hospus, his hand was always held by everyone that loved him. His hands were always warm. That night as he layed in the hospital my brothers and sisters arrived, it was like he waited for us to be together, to take his last breath. Then the sun came up. So just remember when you see the sun rise, and feel the warmth of the sun. That is dad in heaven. Caressing you, throwing that jab, and letting us know he is in a better place.