Chapter One - Mrs. Dempster
- The main character Dunny tells the story of when he was arguing with his friend/enemy Percy Boyd Staunton.
- They had been out sledding and Dunny's sled that was old beat Percy's sled that was new and the latest model.
- Dunny's family was poor and Percy's was rich.
- Percy threw a snowball at Dunny and he ducked.
- The snowball hit Mrs. Dempster who was pregnant. It knocked her over.
- Mr. Dempster got Dunny to help get Mrs. Dempster home on his sled.
- This made Dunny late for supper.
- When Dunny's mom heard of the incident she went to see Mrs. Dempster to make sure that everything was ok with the baby.
- She was well known for bringing babies into the world.
- Mrs. Dempster had a baby boy early and she named him Paul.
- Dunny is writing this in a report to a Headmaster of the school because an article in the College Chronicle offended him.
- The article made him appear to be a doddering old school master.
- The article was called Farewell to the Cork.
- Dunny's nickname was Corky.
- The article was about Dunny's retirement and his career with the college for 45 years.
- They gave him a tape recorder for a present in hopes that he would record his memories.
- Dunny was upset because they didn't list his accomplishments of writing ten books.
- Dunny writes that he is going to tell the headmaster his childhood stories.
- We jump back to village life with Percy Boyd Staunton and Paul Dempster.
- The village had 5 churches, 2 doctors (Percy's father was one of them), 1 lawyer and 1 banker.
- Dunny's father was the owner and operator of the local paper The Deptford Banner.
- Dunny's mother was a clean freak and they had the cleanest privy in the town.
- Paul was born premature and Dunny's mother helped Dr. Staunton take care of him.
- They kept the baby warm with hot water bottles and fed him with fountain pen filler.
- Because Dunny's mother was always at the Dempster's, they had...