What really makes me happy
I can hear the voice of my mom saying, “I just want the best for you.” I do understand that, and I respect that at all times; but “the best for me” is unfortunately something that is not the best for her. I have hurt her and the rest of my family by my actions, but there are still a lot of things that they don’t understand. Now I can say that I am happy, and I am complete.
It all started last November. I became the happiest person in earth, and I still am thanks to the most beautiful person. My mom did not know anything until I came out to her and I told her, looking into her eyes almost breaking out in tears I said, “ I’m in love…in love with…with a girl” It looked like I had said I’m going to die because she gave me the saddest look ever. I had never seen my mom this hurt, but again I had never been this happy. I found myself in between loosing the love of my mom or loosing the love of my life. I explained my reasons and promised her that I was going to be happy, but by the time I got done she said, “I don’t want to hear it anymore, you know my reasons, and I want the best for you. I respect that you are happy, but I want you to respect me and give me my place as your mom. I am against this, but I again I want to see you happy” - she left the room, and I broke out in tears-
“You don’t trust me anymore, and I understand your reasons. I want you to know that you mean everything for me. And I thank you for all you did when I was little. Everything you went through just for giving me life, every judgment you heard just because of me, every finger that pointed at you while you walked around the city, everything you did for me is amazing, and I thank you for that. You have really worked hard for me, and I understand this is not the kind of payback that you deserve. I understand this is not the kind of life you want for me.
Mom, I want you to understand that this makes me happy. In your eyes this is a sin,...